Christmas activities

1. The Ward Party. Friday night was a beautiful and well-attended dinner. The three younger kids mostly ate the candy scattered about the table.

At least their breath was minty-fresh.

The Primary kids did a live nativity: Tyce was a wise man. Harrison was Bryce's sidekick for narration from Luke 2, Cameron was too shy to get on the stage, and Mary pouted back at the table (reason unknown).

The Young Women and some leaders did their dance and I thought it was great! A little chaotic but a lot of fun. We showed the video of their performance in opening exercises Sunday and the girls were like, so embarrassed. j/k

At the end of the party, Santa came to town. A festive time was had by all.

2. Stake Youth Christmas Cantata. Sunday night was a musical presentation called "Jesus, Once of Humble Birth" written by Sally DeFord and directed by the extremely talented Darrell Crowther. I was so happy to have a good turn out, and even happier that we had two sets of visitors: Judge Dawson and his wife, and Donna Silva with her husband and daughter. It was nice to look out and see so many friendly faces. Tyce was a gracious host and welcomed our guests before the performance.

The music was powerful. I really felt the Spirit as I sang of Jesus Christ. Tyce said that he felt the same way. Dallin H. Oaks said that sometimes we gain a testimony by the bearing of it. I think that for many young people that night, that was true.

3. Family Home Evening. Bryce plans the best FHEs, by the way. Bryce had the kids put on their pajamas, get a blanket, and come to the living room. He turned off the lights except for the fireplace and the Christmas tree. After an opening song and prayer, we watched the video "The Nativity." When I hear that angelic voice sing, "Let earth receive her king" while the Virgin Mary holds the baby, it really chokes me up.

After the video we discussed the teachings in Matthew 25, culminating in this verse:

Inasmuch as ye have a done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Bryce brought up the fact that in these tough economic times, some families are struggling to keep their jobs, homes, and food on the table. Mary mentioned that someone at her school lived out of a car. We talked about what it might be like to be cold, hungry, and worried all the time.

And then came the challenge. Bryce asked the kids if they would be willing to forfeit one of their three Christmas gifts, and donate the money we would have spent to help someone else.

The room was quiet.

It was an obviously tough choice. What if they didn't get the thing they really wanted? Could they really part with the joy of "getting"? Would they be able to sacrifice something they wanted to help someone else? I know these thoughts ran through my mind.

Finally Tyce asked, "Can I give my allowance instead of a gift?"

"How much allowance?" Bryce asked.

I think Tyce sat up a little straighter when he said, "A whole year."

Bryce wrote down a figure. "You know that means this much, right?"

Tyce looked at the paper. "Yes. I know. And I want it all to go to Fast Offering."

That money was a million dollars in his eyes, and he gave it away.

(Do you know how proud I was of him at that moment?)

Mary also agreed to give up her allowance, for three months.

I really felt a special spirit in the room that night. Even the little ones wanted to give their "money" away, so Bryce wrote a figure on a piece of paper for them too.

Our closing song summed up the evening:

Because I have been given much, I too must give.
Because of thy great bounty, Lord, each day I live
I shall divide my gifts from thee
with every brother that I see
Who has the need of help from me.

(From Hymns page 219, Text by Grace Noll Crowell, Music
by Phillip Landgrave)

We had a sweet end to the night.

This and that

I "lost" my potato peeler right before Thanksgiving, only to rediscover it in someone's dresser drawer. Of course no one could possibly figure out how it got there.

Here is my latest super-frustration. I went to fetch a Bic from the "pen" drawer and the whole drawer is missing.

(The whole drawer! Hello, who takes an entire drawer? And where in the name of Lulu the Elf is it now??? No one knows.)

Okay, enough complaining.

Here's what's been going on around here.

Bryce and Tyce went on a Scout campout this weekend. Apparently Tyce used his Scout-made slingshot and flung a rock right into his dad's windshield. Their 5 mile hike turned out to be much longer, but at the end they surveyed the entire Las Vegas valley and it was pretty spectacular.

What else. My brother David's birthday was on the 8th. He is, for a few months, just one year younger than I am. He is awesome and I hope he has a fun time celebrating his wonderful self this weekend. In a city full of possibilities, what will he do?

Happy Birthday, brother!

In other news, Cameron and Harrison will start preschool this January. It's only half-day, so we'll still have plenty of time to play with friends.

Cameron

Harrison

As different as the two of them are, they're both excited to go so school like their big sister and brother. Do I need to mention that this arrangement benefits a certain person who is anxiously plotting how to use her new free time?

(Me.)

Tonight we're practicing a dance for YW to perform at the ward Christmas party this Friday. It's to "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies" and it is a ton of fun. (I am so glad not to be in charge of the Christmas party!) After Mutual I have a mega presidency meeting to get ready for the new year. Did you know that a new value was added to the Young Women theme? The value is VIRTUE and the color associated with it is gold.

This Thursday the RS is having a progressive dinner and one of the stops is my house. I am really looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time. You know me.

I took an online traffic course to reduce my speeding ticket to a parking ticket. It was a "four hour" class and I completed it in less than one. There I go, speeding again.

Ba-dum bum.

That's about all for now. The boys are riding scooters in the driveway and we're about to eat lunch and run errands.

THE ANSWER

You may have guessed that this "Does Santa wrap the presents" was a hot topic at work amongst Bryce, Betsy, and Donna last week. There was some debate, some discord, and some consensus. Bryce called me and asked my opinion. The way I came up with THE ANSWER is this. I went to the Big Guy's own website. I typed in santa.com and said: whatever it shows is the way it is.

And as you can see, the gifts are wrapped, with the exception of the live animals. (Please, no one point out that this appears to be a mail bag and not a toy sack.)

As per this official picture, DO NOT wrap a dog or a penguin, no matter what your family's tradition has been in the past. This scene clearly shows the animals need to be free to romp in the presents, or even hand out gifts to others. Plus, it makes for a cute photo on Christmas morning to have a giant mouse peeking out from behind the pile of loot!

Let me tell you how we do it around here. Santa brings one especially desired present for each child, like a bike, or whatever tops the child's list. (Bryce bought Cam a HOT DOG MAKER this year because he said he really wanted one. Good thing he didn't want a machete, eh?)

Anyway. The stocking gifts are also from Santa, and there is usually some good small stuff in there. Candy, little games, maybe a CD, jewelry if you're a girl, markers, etc.

And I have usually asked Santa to wrap his gifts because I want the moment to last longer, but within reason. For example, a CD: wrapped. A bag of candy: unwrapped. Necklace: wrapped. Stuffed animal: unwrapped. I figure if each person takes a turn unwrapping their stuff I can get better pictures AND it will seem like they got more things if it takes 10 minutes versus 10 seconds to open it all. But perhaps Santa will go green this year and all the pressies will be naked.

So that's the low down on Santa at the Jones house.

I certainly enjoyed reading how other people do it, and I think that THE REAL ANSWER is this: however you do it in your family is the right way, as long as you stay away from boxing up living critters.

A woe and a question

I've been trying to move the family towards a more vegetarian diet. Why? Two reasons:

1. Heart health
2. The Word of Wisdom

I have made entirely delicious curry lentils, stir-fried tofu and vegetables, eggs, vegetable soups, black beans, navy beans, egg rolls, and fish. Unfortunately, my efforts have been met with resistance from the older two kids. A typical dinner time might go like this.

Mary: Eww, what's this?

Me: It's quinoa with salmon and broccoli.

Mary: Can I make myself a peanut butter sandwich?

Me: No, you can eat this with the rest of the family.

Mary: Mommmmm, I can't! This smells disgusting!

Me: Just try it. It's really good.

Mary: I can't! I'll just starve! And you'll feel bad that you tortured me to death with this meal.

Me: Hmmm, I don't think so. Listen, the salmon is crying, "Mary, please take a bite of me! I'm delicious! You're hurting my feelings!"

It hasn't really worked yet.

As for the other kids, Tyce never whines or complains--after the requisite 5 minutes he just puts his plate in the sink. The twins are picky on the best of days, so the vegetarian fare isn't any more rejected than non-vegetarian. (Two out of four of our kids actually do like fish. But four out of four reject lentils.)

I will say that my kids have a voracious appetite for all fruits and most raw vegeatables, which is why we are on a first-name basis with the produce manager at the grocery store.

I've heard it takes 21 (?) times to introduce a food to a child before they'll accept it, but I'm still frustrated because it is good, normal food that normal people like to eat. I know because I've asked Bryce, just to make sure someone else finds my offerings palatable. I am usually affirmed. He even gave a thumbs-up to the tofu stir fry. Tofu!

No one complains when I bake, and I'm not even that great of a baker. If it has sugar and butter in it, all the kids flock around me with praises and hugs. But these are the same kids who like Pop Tarts, so you know they're not too hard to please.

Well anyway, that's my woe for the day.

Now onto my next topic, the pressing question of the day.

Pressing Question of the Day: Does Santa deliver gifts wrapped or unwrapped?

What do you think? How does it work at your house? Is there a right answer?

P.S. I know.

And so does Donna.

My letter to St. Nick

Dear Santa,

I'd like to strike a deal with you. See this block? It's mine. That's right, it's a writer's block. And I'm tired of it! I don't know where I got it or why it won't leave me alone, but if you take it . . . well, let's just say there might be a pack of HoHos for your trouble.

Hope to see you soon. How do you get it all done? I only have a few people to shop for and I feel like drowing my sorrows in a carton of egg nog.

Sincerely,

Me

For all you single ladies out there

Acrostic in the key of G (Gratitude)

Turkey was delicious.
Homemade crescent rolls by Bryce and Tyce were a labor of love.
Ads in the newspaper were not as amazing as promised.
Nice dishes and table settings were Mary's project and her pride and joy.
Kids liked watching the movie "The Abyss."
Stormy weather, rain, thunder, lightning were a treat!
Going around the table, we each said what we were thankful for.
I enjoyed walking with the twins and Bryce around the neighborhood.
Venturing into unknown culinary terrain, I made homemade cranberry sauce.
I know Bryce and I loved talking to our families on the phone.
"Nothing ruins a holiday better than people trying to do everything perfect." --Mary Rachel Jones (Has she been reading my blog?)
Games were played until everyone was tired and ready for bed.

It's a Monday

We're having the house cleaners come and the carpets cleaned today in preparation for Thanksgiving. You know I don't live a life of glamour if I thought this was worth mentioning.

I am thankful for a calm start to the week. My awesome father-in-law Al went in for an emergency angioplasty on Friday and scared us all to death. But he was out the very next day and cheering for BYU at home. (It didn't do any good. There was a lot of crying over here.) We have full confidence that he will return to normal soon, but unfortunately for us, not in time to travel for Thanksgiving. But thank goodness he's going to be okay.

I'd rather forego a holiday gathering and preserve his health than have him risk a prolonged recovery by traveling.

Now I'm off to take M. to school and figure out how to spend 10 hours out of the house today.

My house may be a mess, but take a look at this pantry!

If you come visit me, please disregard the piano music, random toys, and various clothing items strewn around the front rooms. Move directly into the kitchen, where you should ignore the sink full of dishes and unswept floor. Make a hard right, and open the pantry door.

My eagle-eyed sister-in-law Kim noticed I took "CanSolidator" off of my sidebar wishlist. Behold the organization!

Another hurdle cleared

It was not a good start to the day. As I paid for 8 giant cans of corn at the grocery store, Harrison and Cameron walked out the automatic doors. They stood on the other side, watching the door open and close, and actually had the nerve--THE NERVE--to stick their tongues out at me. (Harrison was the ring leader.) You have never seen anybody pay up as fast as I did.

They were big-time busted. In the car I lectured them, and I took away Harrison's tangerine until we got home. Cameron mocked me by saying, "Good thing I already ate my tangerine. Haha!" Luckily I know how to push Cameron's buttons back, because I said, "Well next time you can't pick out a fruit." Then there were cries of "No! I'm sorry! Next time I'll be good! Please!"

Which is all I wanted in the first place.

***

Preparations and set up for the youth-and-senior citizens dinner for Mutual were stressful. I won't lie. I wanted to bail out, I wanted to call in sick, I wanted to run away to Jamaica. And then I was like, what's the big deal? It's all under control. (Well mostly, what I could actually control.) I guess my main anxiety came from whether people would have a good time, if the youth and older folks would actually mingle, if we had enough food, if we'd carried out the "tradition" none of us leaders had ever experienced.

I sound like the poster child for Xanax.

But guess what . . . it was great. We didn't run out of food. It looked like people enjoyed themselves. I was particularly impressed with Kayla, who spearheaded a baby picture guessing game, and Ceara, who did a fine job conducting (though she did get heckled for accidently calling the seniors "elderly.") I got to sit at a table with some very nice people, and enjoyed good food (turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, cranberry sauce, rolls, and pumpkin pie) and good conversation.

I think that an annual youth and seniors dinner is an awesome idea. I would highly recommend the activity to other groups. And after all that cooking we did, I would also recommend catering.

What I lost in sleep I gained in perspective: Hosting Thanksgiving dinner for 14 this year will be a breeze.

A happy ending

I felt grumbly on Saturday. Grrr.

In the afternoon I ran an errand, alone. While getting my car washed I walked over to Vons to check out their turkeys for our Thanksgiving activity this Wednesday. It felt great to walk that UGH feeling out. Then I bought 3 frozen pizzas for the family's dinner. When I walked back to the car wash the guy was there waving his towel. I'd arrived at the exact moment he finished up my car. Perfect timing!!!!

Then I went to pick up medication at the Walgreens drive-thru. I was the only one there. Score!

I think the sun was shining on me.

Don't you just love when things work out just right?

Blessings of Adoption

Tomorrow is National Adoption Day. In honor of this occasion I thought I'd share with you a few of my thoughts and feelings on the subject.

I believe adoption is a miracle. Think of the allegory of the grafting of tame and wild branches in the olive tree--the Master of the Vineyard, in his wisdom, took two entities that needed the benefit from the other--and he made them one.

And how beautiful was the tree because of it.

I love my life. I love how my children came into my life. I love our family tree. I love the Master of the Vineyard for binding our family eternally.

And that is the deepest joy of my heart.

***

Now on to a more practical note.

There have been many times I've said something, trying to be supportive or insightful, when I've offended someone instead.

(Like the time in high school when a classmate told me she was half Native American and I exclaimed, "Oh, you're a half-breed!" I had no idea that was a racially charged thing to say.)
Anyway, I'm not one to easily take offense but I do recognize insensitivity when I hear it, usually letting it roll off my back. Maybe you're the same way. However, if I could enlighten you a bit on what to say to an adoptive family, perhaps I could help you save yourself from an uncomfortable situation. Here are some things people have actually said to me, or to someone I know.
"Your children are so lucky you rescued them from a horrible life."
I feel that they rescued me as much a I did them.
"I heard this story where the couple had their baby for 5 months and then the state pulled him out of the home and returned him to the crack-smoking grandma . . ."
Sensational horror stories don't make up the majority of adoption stories, but they get the attention and can scare people away.
"You had your children the easy way."
Physical pain: yes. Mental anguish: right up there.
"How much did your kids cost?"
Ummm . . . I didn't pick them up at Macy's Baby Sale.
"Were their parents on drugs?"
I understand your curiosity, but you just can't ask that. I don't want you to pre-judge our kids based on that information, good or bad. We love and respect our birth parents because they gave our children life.
"I had no idea your daughter's hair was so long."
I'll admit that this is picky, but what I feel like you're saying is, her hair is so different and strange and unlike the "normal" hair you see every day.
"Blacks are responsible for bad schools, crime, teen pregnancy, global warming . . . oh, but not your kids."
Racist remarks offend me. I said I wasn't easily offended but this is the thing the bothers me the most. Don't assume it's okay to say it but exclude my kids from the stereotype. Not cool.
"There was a Mulatto guy on my soccer team."
The term is mixed race or bi-racial, please.
"You should need a license to reproduce in this country."
Again, a picky one I've probably said myself. But what it implies is an US against THEM mentality, a superiority that relegates birth parents to the underbelly of society. This is absolutely false. Birth parents have a myriad of circumstances--from lovingly placing their babies in the arms of a forever family, or yes, to having their 8th crisis pregnancy end a whirlwind of social workers and foster homes--or something in between. The point is, they gave their children life. That life is not a mistake; he or she is a child of God with an important work to do on this earth.
We don't live in a perfect world and wishing won't make it so. It's what we do about it that makes the difference.
"What do you know about their REAL parents?"
Does anyone really say this? I don't think so, but I'm including this anyway. REAL parents raise you. Birth parents give you life. All are important.
"Aww, that's so cute that she calls you 'Mom.'"
An old lady said this in all sincerity! Yeah, it's cute because I AM her mom!
"I know just how you feel. I adopted my Fifi from the pound."
For the love of Christmas, do not compare my child to your Yorkie Poo.
"Just watch, as soon as you adopt this next one, you'll get pregnant."
Probably the most common and annoying of all, for two reasons. First, no I don't think I'll get pregnant, and thanks for reminding me . And second, it implies that adoption is a second choice. For us, that's not the case at all.
Okay, now the do's.
Throw the prospective adoptive mother a baby shower!
She is about to become a mother too, with all the anxiety, nervousness, anticipation, and enthusiasm any parent feels at her baby's arrival. Thank you, Tracey, for throwing mine over 3 years ago!
Treat adopted kids like you would any other kids.
Easy to do.
Use the term "birth parents."
Of course not "real" parents, as mentioned above. Biological parents is acceptable. Natural parents is really outdated. The last time I heard that phrase was on an episode of "Family Ties" where Skippy reunites with his "natural mother."
Celebrate the family's adoption day and sealing day!
These are the "birthdays" of the family. We loved that people supported and loved us through the challenging and amazing times.
Respect the family's privacy.
If you're open and have a listening ear, the adoptive family will probably open up to you. A lot. But don't be intrusive.
Accept the child for who he or she is, knowing there might be more than meets the eye.
While adoption is wonderful, it still means the child experiences pain from a significant loss. Pain can look like aggression or depression and be expressed or internalized, or come out in other ways. Their challenges may be difficult for you (and me) to understand but they're doing the best they can.
Talk about adoption in a positive manner.
It's not shameful and it's not a secret. Many families have open, loving relationships with their child's birth parent(s). If you know someone struggling with infertility or a crisis pregnancy, you can offer a positive opinion on adoption.
Tell them they have a beautiful family / beautiful, smart children.
It's okay to acknowledge it. We think so too. And we love flattery as much as the next person!
Smile.
You can make the difference in someone's day!!!

And now I'm stepping off my soap box and into my minivan to cart Miss M. off to school.

Weekend Wrap Up

We had a great time in Utah this weekend. I really needed a change of scenery, and even though we had two terrorists in the car ("Open my window! Turn off the music!") it was still a good trip. We even got to see our sweet nieces (ages 6 and 2) and Betsie's new beautiful house. Family is the best.

Today is a catch-up day--unpacking, laundry, straightening, grocery shopping (already done), and all that other fun stuff. And the phone calls--holy hannah, I have work to do. I don't know why anyone would actually run to be president of anything.

(President-elect Obama, call me. Once you get your feet under you, I will be your shoulder to cry on.)

Guess what I brought into the courtroom

I had my court appearance for my traffic ticket this week. At the entrance I put my bag on the security belt. When I walked through the metal detector, the buzzer went off. The guard looked at my shoes and declared, "You've got a metal buckle on your fancy slippers."

FANCY SLIPPERS!! I will never look at those flats the same way again.

Anyway, I walked up to the courtroom, sat down, and searched for the cheat sheet Bryce made me. I'm pretty sure it said things like Plead Not Guilty, Call Him Your Honor, Compliment His Robe. But I couldn't be sure, because I couldn't find that little paper in my giant bag. But guess what I did find. A wool sock stuffed with not one, not two, but THREE super-sharp PARING KNIVES, left over from our Mutual pumpkin-carving activity the week before.

Take note. Metal on your footwear: red flag. Three deadly weapons that could stab, maim, or kill at any time: no problem!

Knives, people.

Well, I neatly wrapped my little secret back up and stopped looking for the paper. I didn't want anyone to get, you know, suspicious. All that digging around might have meant I was trying to cover something, or maybe I was just foraging for graham cracker crumbs--but you just can't be too careful.

Finally it was my turn. I told the judge he looked very handsome. I think he was impressed by my shoes. I pleaded Not Guilty and we parted ways.

A bored-looking city attorney with a pack of Marlboros in his shirt pocket met me in the hallway. I turned on my sad-but-charming face, which I have used before. I explained, boo hoo, that I hadn't had a ticket for over 10 years, I didn't mean to ignore the sign, etc. He looked like he wanted to say, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, Not Guilty. Seriously, I went to law school for THIS?" but he said, "I can reduce your ticket by $100 and send you to traffic school. Here, take this paperwork and go pay at the window. I need a smoke."

Oh, I can work it when I need to.

Yes, I can.

One down

I am a runner on the track of November, and I just jumped over my first hurdle.

The program Young Women in Excellence was last night, and I must say, after all the anxiety and stress leading up to it, it was . . . excellent.

The girls displayed projects they've worked on in one of the seven values: Faith, Divine Nature, Individual Worth, Knowledge, Choice and Accountability, Good Works, and Integrity. There were items such as volleyballs, scrapbooks, handicrafts, reports on service, and art projects. We have awesome young women.

As far as the program goes, a highlight for me was the skit that my very talented friend Tomica wrote. The script was great--set at school, one girl laments that she'll never see her grandmother again, and the other girls explain the Plan of Salvation and invite her to church. It was funny, touching, and the acting by the girls was awesome!

I knew, knew, knew that the whole program would be fine, which helped me get through the day. I am getting SO much better about letting things go--the little details that I can get so hung up on. I printed the program--no clipart, no colored fonts. It took me 30 minutes. We put the tablecloths out--they weren't exactly even and weren't in value color "order" but I let it go. Only four out of the seven flags had all their parts, but the four we had looked great. Our special musical number was less-rehearsed than I would have liked, but it turned out fine.

Breathing in, breathing out . . . letting go.

I truly love the Young Women. I am so blessed to have this calling. I love the ladies I serve with, and the awesome young people of the church.

My next hurdle is planning the Thanksgiving dinner for the youth and the elderly in the ward. I have no idea what I'm doing or how to do this, and I'm wondering how this fell into my lap. But I'm taking a deep breath and . . . sprinting onward.

Hello, Mr. President

What did you think of tonight's election results? My support and prayers are behind our future 44th president. Feeling patriotic and hopeful, we watched Barack Obama's acceptance speech tonight. I thought he did a great job.

Mary: So if Obama is the next president, where did the old president go?

Me: Well, he doesn't start until January. That gives the old president--George W. Bush--time to finish up and the upcoming president--that's Barack Obama--time to get ready. I mean, he couldn't really start this very second, right?

Mary: Yeah, that makes sense. He wouldn't even know where his desk was!

Me: Right, and he has to move all of his stuff into the White House.

Mary: Move in? Does the White House have bathrooms?

Me: Yes, and living rooms, bedrooms, a kitchen . . .

Mary: Oooh, I hope I grow up to marry the president of the United States--or become president myself. That would be awesome! Well, actually, I wouldn't want to be the president because I wouldn't want people coming into my house and complaining at me all the time.

Me: That's why it takes a special person to do the job.

Mary: I hope his children aren't troublesome. That would be terrible if they terrorized the White House!

Me: Would you terrorize the White House if you were there?

Mary: I would try not to, but probably, yeah.

Overheard

On the road with a van full of youth, on the way to a choir practice

#1: Hey [#2], I noticed I didn't see your sister at church today. Is she okay?

#2: Yeah, she went with our mom and dad to their classes today.

#1: Really? Was she upset with somebody?

#2: Yeah, she and of of the young women got in a fight before chuch and they both got grounded.

Tyce: (eyes her suspiciously) Did she get in a fight with YOU, by chance?

#2: Ye--I mean, I am not in justice to discuss this matter.

Tyce: I think you mean, you are not "at liberty" to discuss this matter.

#2: Whatever.

***


At night, telling the boys a bedtime story

Harrison: Make sure you tell it where we're knights and we get cupcakes at the end.

Me: Okay. Once there were two brave knights who went trick-or-treating. They went to the first spooky house and said, "Trick or treat!" and they both got two candies each. Then they went to the next house . . ."

Harrison: Don't forget the cupcakes!

Me: I won't, don't worry.

Cameron: I have contraband.

Me: What?

Cameron: Contraband. I'm going to play this straw in the contraband. Hoo hoo!

Me: Okay . . .

Cameron: Mom, why aren't you telling the story? Get it away.

Me: What?

Cameron: (grandly gestures) Get it away, Mom!

I finally figured out that was this is his attempt to say "Take it away."

***

Watching the Noggin show "Miss Spider" with the twins; Miss Spider adopted several different types of bugs and in this episode, one of them wants her mom to show her the tree where she was born.

Me: Harrison, you were adopted too!

Harrison: Like that little beetle?

Me: That's right.

Harrison: What tree did you find me under?

Halloween Report

These were their costumes. It was a spooktacular night.

Tyce was the very dashing and presidential Barack Obama. He went to a surprise birthday / Halloween party for his friend Skye and had a blast.


Here's where it gets fuzzy. Literally. My camera has been dropped so many times that the flash no longer works. But I hope you can tell that the twins were knights; black (Cam) and silver (Hare).


Mary was a sorceress and she had this pretty hat to go with her dress....which she refused to wear. ("It looks too princess-y!" she complained. Hmmmm....yes.)


We even went to our next door neighbor's house for a little get-together.

Our "other" neighbors were in their element. I saw one of them (the one I call Billy Hill), in a long black tunic with a ciggie hanging from his lips, putting out still more decorations, including the the giant green skull. And I have to say, all his hard work paid off. I was scared.

Halloween Haiku

THE STATE OF THE CHILDREN, by Me

Dreaming of candy
Dressed up, fidgeting, waiting
Hoping for nightfall.

WHO I AM

I am level-headed and open-hearted.
I know I am a daughter of God.
I want whirled peas.
I think a lot of truth is spoken in jest.
I dislike when kids wake up before me.
I miss living in Texas.
I feel good when I use my talents.
I hear children playing in the backyard.
I smell spicy salsa in the kitchen.
I crave lemon bars.
I cry a lot more than I used to.
I usually do things by the book.
I search the Internet for recipes and long lost friends.
I wonder how my children will turn out.
I regret the times I have put off a child's request to read a story.
I love teasing Bryce.
I care too much what others think.
I always plan good birthday parties.
I worry about my home's declining value.
I am not a door slammer.
I remember my dog Maggie.
I never ever swear.
I believe that that I am doing my best.
I dance a lot better in my mind than in real life.
I sing in ward choir.
I don't always meet my own expectations.
I argue politely or back down.
I write to express my feelings and keep my sanity.
I win at word games.
I lose at puzzle or strategy games.
I wish all children could grow up in happy, stable homes.
I listen to the TV news on my kitchen radio.
I don't understand why power is so important to people.
I usually can be found at the computer or in the kitchen.
I am scared of tight spaces.
I forget how hard life used to be.
I am happy when I cross everything off my list.

Spooky tidings

Monday at Family Home Evening the kids created three jack-o-lanterns (the boys) and one jill-o-lantern (the girl) and let me just say . . . pumpkin guts are deliciously squishy.


Each person showed off his/her creation. (The twins had help, obviously. But if given the chance they'd love to wield a knife.) I like the eyes on Tyce's.


Lighting up a dark the dark and scary night!


Happy Almost Halloween!

"Me and my Dad"

Dictated to me (Rebecca) by Mary. Sorry if you read this before I had a chance to correct spelling--she's a fast talker.

Hi, Mary here. Mom wanted me to tell you about my vacation with my fun and exciting dad since I'm on track break, and I guess she thinks Dad is taking too long.

When we first got to the Excalibur hotel, me and my dad called on the telephone for our bags. When they brought them up, me and my dad slipped on our swimsuits and went out to check out the swimming pool.



It was fun because we were the only ones who stayed long. We had the whole pool to ourselves! I grabbed onto Dad's back real tight and then he would go underwater and swim as long as he could. Once I even stood up on his back like I was surfing. We went back and forth between the hot tub and the pool. That's it for the pool.

After we went swimming Dad and I went and looked around the food court. I decided to get a cheese pizza from Pizza Hut. You even had your very own box of breadsticks with three breadsticks in it. Dad got pepperoni pizza with breadsticks. He let me have Moutain Dew even though it was late at night.

Then we went down to the game place, the kid section. We played lots of carnival games and I won about a billion prizes. The best one I did was where there were a bunch of white cups and there were five red cups, four blue cups, and three yellow cups, and was one green cup in the middle. If you got the ball in the middle green one, you could choose any prize you wanted. And I got it in the green cup on the 7th try! (You got 10 balls.) I chose a big black dog with a bone collar.



After me and my dad finished the carnival games, we went back up to our room at about 8 or 9:30. Then we looked on "On Demand" and we selected a movie. Before we started the movie we went back downstairs and got an ice cream and a fresh donut straight from the factory. I got cotton candy ice cream with gummi bears and cherries and caramel on top. We went back into the room and watched the movie and ate our snack. We watched "Narnia 2: Prince Caspian."

Then after the movie, me and my dad talked in our beds for a while about our day. Then we went to sleep at about 12:30 at night!

When we woke up the next morning we ordered room service and it took an HOUR for our food to get here.



After we ate our breakfast, we went to my dad's work office and I got a sucker, three Crunch bars, a Heath bar, and one gumball.

After we went Dad's office we went to Circus Circus. At Circus Circus I rode on a ride called "The Inverter". It was fun and scary at the same time. What happened was, you basically were in a guitar shaped ride, where it kept going around and around slowly, back and forth, and then the scariest part was when it held you upside down in your seat for about 20 seconds. After I rode on The Inverter, me and my dad went on a ride called "The Disco." You were on a moon shaped track going on a flat disk that was spinning around while it was going side to side on the track.

After that me and my dad went on the most scariest roller coaster that I ever went on. And it wasn't scary because it was going fast and there were a million loops that were going upside down and round and round. It was because when we got off the ride, we heard the people talking. They said, "It wasn't supposed to do that! Why did it do that?" and me and my dad realized that we had been on a ride in which our safety was dependent on some teenager reading the instructions right!

Then me and my dad went back to the hotel and went swimming AGAIN. After that we headed for the carnival games again. Dad said last time we spent all his money on games and he had to get more money so this time he set a very low budget. It was only $20. After that we went back to the food court and ate lunch. This time we had pizza again, just the same thing as we got last time.

After that we went to the dragon store and looked around. I saw a very interesting book and sat down and started reading. Dad let me get two lollipops and a princess headband for the show we were going to that night.



And he let me pick two glass sculptures of dragons. One was an egg with two dragon heads sticking out of it. I named the two baby dragons Solis and Luna. And the other dragon sculpture was a dragon sitting on a pile of rocks wrapped around a dead tree. I named him Gemini.

Then we went to the show! It was called the Tournament of Kings. Our king was the King of France. He wore a light blue shirt and cape and dark navy blue pants with a gold stripe down the sides. He won the whole tournament because he was the one who saved the king. And he won the sword fighting, and the jousing match. And he also defeated the evil dragon lord. At the end, he let me pet his horse and then he let me sit on the horse, and take a picture with him.



The next morning we went the the Ethel M chocolate factory. When we were finished with the tour he let me choose 12 chocolates to take home! Then instead of leaving right away we sat in the garden and talked while we ate some of the chocolates. Then we headed for home.

Next time we go on a trip I want to do the exact same thing, because it was fun! I was very excited when we left because I haven't been able to spend time with my dad for a long time. I love you, Dad!

And that's the end of our vacation!

A headline that could be a long, long essay

"I am tired of being responsible all the time."

You know, the usual.

Daddy-Daughter Days

A year-and-a-half ago Bryce and Mary had a really cool excursion planned, just the two of them, to San Diego. They were going to the Wild Animal Park, a whale-watching cruise, and the beach. Bryce loaded the car the night before, and at 5 a.m., all that was left was to lift the sleeping beauty herself into the back seat.

But I ruined the plan. I became horribly ill with strep throat, stomach flu, yellow fever, Johnny fever, and monkey pox. (Well, that's how it felt. I just had the first one.) And through my tears I begged him to just go, to have a great time with his little girl, because I knew how much she wanted this trip.

But in my heart I knew I couldn't take care of two 2-year-olds for even a few minutes, let alone a few days.

And so they stayed.

So all this time I've felt bad about their canceled vacation. Bryce and Mary had talked at length about rescheduling, of course, but other obligations and plans interfered. Until now.

They finally had their trip, and it was grand.

I will allow Bryce the pleasure of writing about their actual vacation, but I thought I'd post a picture just to tease you. Can you tell where they stayed?

A video worthy of your time

Remember when I said I was listening the Christian radio station? I can't imagine why I've never heard this song. Maybe because without the video it just wouldn't be the same.



I'll bet Sal was every choir director's dream with that enunciation. Zap!

I would have loved a close up of the guy with the orange guitar. Sweet moves, Uncle Herb! I wish I had a family band that rocked this hard. It's interesting how the grand piano is merely a prop and the electric keyboard shines in this number. I'm taking notes . . . for when my own band makes it big, ya know?

My date with the Senator

On Friday Bryce and I (and 50 of our closest acquaintances) had dinner with the highest-ranking Democrat in Senate. In the U.S. In the WORLD. The J. Reuben Clark Law Society, Las Vegas chapter, honored Harry Reid at a special dinner at the Ritz-Carlton at Lake Las Vegas. Betsy Fowler was on the committee and did a great job, including making some killer name tags. It's Sunday and I'm wearing mine right now.



As we entered the grounds, I said, "Oooooh, pretty fountain!" and whipped out my camera. Bryce chided me saying, "Rebecca, act like you've been here before." Apparently that is sports talk for "Don't go to pieces now." I will file this away with other helpful phrases I've learned over the years, such as "they need to just play within themselves", "they can't play on the road", and "they won because they wanted it more." Sometimes when there's a game on and I'm not paying attention, I bat these phrases around and score major brownie points.



Anyway, we walked in and found our way to the ballroom. In a room filled with attorneys I felt compelled to say, "I'm not a lawyer, but I play one on TV." Luckily I used that line on Betsy and got it out of my system.

We sat with Betsy, her friend Sara, and some cute UNLV law students. Bryce was a lucky man surrounded by lots of lovely ladies. I should have taken a picture of the food becuase it was as beautiful as it was delicious. A good time was had by all.

Then it was time for the program. I'm sure I will butcher this becuase I don't have my paper in front of me, but the head lawyer for the Church spoke for a few minutes, and then Lloyd D. George (for whom the federal courthouse is named) introduced Harry Reid. Senator Reid talked to us as a member of the Church and native Nevadan rather than as a senator, and I found him to be likeable--if a bit full of himself. I don't mean that rudely. Seriously, how do you get in that position if you're not extremely confident? It was interesting to hear him talk about some of his cases as a trial lawyer (against Lloyd D. George!) and his feelings as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He also recounted the story of how Judge Dawson (Bryce's judge) came to accept the appointment to the federal bench. He was a very good speaker, very personable and entertaining.

Unfortunately right after his remarks he was whisked away by his body guards, so I never got a picture. I should've just snapped one anyway, right? Except that those body guards looked pretty serious . . .

After the dinner I was introduced to so many nice people Bryce works with, including Judge George. He's in his 80s and he knew my cousin Una quite well, so I have a soft spot for him. He told the best story about being a pool boy at The Sands casino long ago. His supervisor told him to bring two lounge chairs and a screwdriver over for Frank Sinatra and his crew. Young Lloyd D. George brought the lounge chairs and a semi-working umbrella, and set out to look for a screwdriver. About 30 minutes later he came back and apologized that he couldn't find one anywhere. Frank Sinatra snapped, "I want a screwdriver the drink, not the tool, you imbicile!" Oh boy, I got a good laugh out of that.

Afterwards we walked around the grounds and listened the all the live bands, and wondered, why don't we come here more often? And Betsy, why didn't I get my picture taken with you?



Even though I didn't get a photo with the Senator Reid, I think he looked right at me and I just smiled. I'm pretty sure Bryce was proud--because I played within myself, and I acted like I'd been there before.

Roch-it Man

This week we had a blast from the past--our good friend Roch Player came to visit! I say "our" friend but he was really Bryce's roommate for several years, and I just have the pleasure of knowing him better through Bryce. (I was acquainted with him in college and thought he was a great guy.)

Roch was on his way to his brother's wedding in Cedar City, Utah, and we were so happy he stopped by to see us. He lives in Washington state with his wife and four adorable daughters. He's an engineer and he has several adopted brothers and sisters. And on top of that, he's as nice a person as you're ever likely to meet. He is especially good with kids, and ours loved the attention.

We enjoyed talking, the kids just loved showing off (!), and when I had to leave for a stake meeting, Bryce and Roch looked at old pictures and had a great time.

Bryce and Roch.


The "goofy" shot (though this is what we look like most of the time).


There's nothing like reconnecting with an old friend.

Better judgment prevails

I started to feel really bad about making fun of my neighbors, so I took that last post down. It doesn't do me any good to complain, and the only person I can change is myself, so . . . Lord help me, but I'm actually going to try to be nice.

Feelings

I just love to get in touch with my emotions--can't you tell? j/k Of course you can.

Today I'm feeling stressed out because of my church work. I have two big events coming up and I just found out that there will be personnel changes in our organization. I was overwhelmed with the two upcoming events BEFORE I knew about anything. I really loved things the way they were, which was my big mistake. I should have just grouched and grumbled about everything, and three years from now I'd still be in the same position.

But I'm grouchy and grumbly about my new neighbors, so using that logic, I'm pretty sure they'll be here for the long haul. They really, really love Halloween. It looks like K Mart's after-holiday clearance sale threw up in their yard. Yeah, I said it.

Is it bad to begrudge someone the joy of putting 8 inflatable decorations on a 10x10 plot of rock? Or to attach a huge green inflatable skull to your roof, while screcrows, spiderwebs, and blinking lights litter the remaining space? Or to keep your junky garage open all day and night while you sit in the driveway on a vinyl lawn chair, shirtless?

Don't answer that.

I know.

This is something I must work on.

Week in Pictures

Tuesday: Mary and I went to get pedicures. Look how cute her toes are.


Wednesday: Entry for the Naughty File: Harrison decorated our baseboards for miles.


Thursday: Bryce and I went to the first play of the season. It had the sidekick from "Walker, Texas Ranger" in it.


Friday: Went to Basic High School's football game, because the junior high band was playing. Tyce is standing up.


Bryce and Mary love to be silly.


Tyce came down after half-time to say hi.


Saturday: Cameron practiced his Jedi moves on Harrison.


We went out for a fun evening with the Pendletons (but I forgot my camera).

Sunday: Bryce helped the little boys make cookies. (He had to do a little touch up work when they weren't looking.) What they lacked in presentation, I'm happy to say, they made up for in taste.

Lessons Learned

1. Yesterday I seeded and chopped chilis from Bryce's dad's garden, probably about 50. During the chopping it felt like something had stung me under my ring, so I took the ring off. A little while later it felt like part of my hand was kind of burning. By the time I was finished, both of my hands were on FIRE from the wicked hot chili oil.

Cold water felt wonderful...for the moment. But I couldn't very well stay submerged in an ice bucket all day. So I went online looking for remedies. You know I was desperate because I actually scrubbed my hands with bleach--straight bleach. You know, the base counteracting the acid and all that . . . and it didn't even hurt. I'm not sure if it helped, or if I'd just basically burned a layer of skin off by that point, but the pain lessened.

I told Mary, "Man, I can still feel my hands stinging today."

She said, "Well, I guess you've learned a good lesson."

And the lesson is: Wear gloves when you chop little chilis.



2. I got an e-mail informing me (and others) of an upcoming event in an organization. It asked our opinions on a certain subject, and to e-mail with any concerns. So I did. And I was politely informed that things were not changing, but thanks for my input.

Lesson learned: When people ask for your opinion, sometimes they don't really want your opinion.



3. I had a meeting with one of the Young Women classes, and afterward one of the members (Girl #1), who is super friendly and, I would say, "popular," confided in me how hurt she is by some of the other class members. They ignore her at school in favor of impressing a more "in" crowd--but at church they are buddy-buddy with her. So basically she feels like a "B List" friend--good enough when there's no one better around.

Our meeting was over, and Girl #1 and another class member, Girl #2 (a very witty but somewhat shy person, not one of the snubbers) left together. Afterward Girl #2 called and told me this: She, Girl #2, had always felt like an outsider, despite the fact Girl #1 would invite her to do stuff and try to be her friend. Though she really respected Girl #1, she believed that Girl #1 was just being friendly out of duty or obligation, so she always declined the offers.

After a long talk, Girl #2 realized how wrong she'd been. She had no idea that such a seemingly happy, outgoing person could be looking for a real friend too--and how she'd probably added to Girl #1's unhappiness by rejecting her invitations. Now the two of them are forging a friendship that benefits them both (and warms my heart.)

Lesson learned: A "popular" person can be lonely, and an "outsider" can be the kind of friend everyone wishes they had.

So luckily for me, I finish out the week a little wiser than I started.

From the Mouth of.....Cameron Jones

Some Cameron-isms.

Me: Mary's going to clean the bathroom now.

Cam: (Looking embarrassed) I don't know how to clean the bathroom yet.

Me: That's okay, you're only 4. When you get bigger like Mary you'll learn how.

Cam: (Looking a bit horrified) I don't want to get bigger.


Today at dinner:

Me: What does the world look like from inside your mind, Cam?

Cam: It looks like a cat. Or a dog.

Because you don't want to work right now, do you?

Come take a break and create a wordle.

And when you're done, you can check out these. This one is my blog text, and this one is from the Interests section in my blog profile.

Maybe you're in the mood to read a mystery. I found this intriguing story beginning under the kitchen table when sweeping.

***
"Mary, Tyce," said the Comissioner. "We have an important mission for you."

"If you want the Joneses, you take all the Joneses," said Tyce.

"Yeah, doing spy work is easy but keeping the family together is hard and that's the mission we're fighting for," said Mary . . .
***

Or maybe you're like me and going apple-picking soon and want to do some research on the different varieties out there.

So take a break, and then . . .

GET BACK TO WORK! But I won't tell if you don't.

Cast your Vote

I am so glad that Bryce, Tyce, and Harrison are home because I sure missed them. They apparently had fun at the game on Friday, and then Bryce, Tyce, and Grandpa Al went to the Priesthood session on Saturday night. (Tyce wrote a little about it on his blog.) Perhaps I can persuade Bryce to elaborate on their weekend. You already know how my weekend was . . . weepy. LOL But enriching, uplifting, and good.

Well you know how I've been thinking about the upcoming election and why there are only two main candidates--can America's views really be lumped into to two parties without bordering on the absurd? I say the answer is NO. It's time for a stronger third party.

Four highly qualified individuals answered my three pressing questions. My query to you, the reader, is this: Are we ready for such bold agents for change? Could the world's problems be solved by one of these Washington outsiders? You decide.

QUESTION: What is the biggest problem facing children today?

Candidate #1: Safety--kids getting left in cars, kidnapping, and stuff like that.
Candidate #2: Eating their snacks all gone.
Candidate #3: School.
Candidate #4: Catching fish and getting on a boat.

QUESTION: What should the government spend its money on?

Candidate #1: Charity--giving poor people money for food.
Candidate #2: Buying toys.
Candidate #3: Affordable insurance for all.
Candidate #4: Buffets.

QUESTION: How can America reduce its dependency on foreign oil?

Candidate #1: Start making fuel out of trash.
Candidate #2: Put the flags up.
Candidate #3: Drill more oil here in America.
Candidate #4: I don't know. Chocolate milk!

Emotional

Thank you, Elder Oaks, for telling telling the world that bringing a cell phone to church is evil. (Isn't that what he said? That's what I heard.)

I'm super emotional today. It's partly a lack of sleep, partly missing my family, partly feeling overwhelmed with the responsibility of being a good mother. I love my kids SO MUCH and sometimes I see so clearly their intrinsic goodness coupled with my inadequacy.

I found a school journal entry from Mary. It said, "I want to go to Africa to visit my family." And then she drew a picture of herself saying, "Dad! It's me Mary!" Through a sea of stick figures one shouts, "Mary!"

She made herself so vulnerable in that moment, and I felt that I'd seen into her very precious, wounded soul. How I ache for her, physically ACHE for her loss and her hope.

I can't help but cry to the Lord, Please lift up and strenghthen these little ones, who love their first parents and long to know who they really are. Make me an instrument in Thy hands, as I try to raise these four children of God.

On Children
by Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let our bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Musings

On Wednesday the youth did baptisms at the temple and it was wonderful . . . even though Tyce got a bloody nose on his first plunge under the water! But he was okay and he says that "it was awesome." It was really cool being there as a leader and a mom. I was re-impressed with my Laurels who were there, because they really display leadership and maturity. For example, in the car on the way up, some of the younger girls were bad-mouthing their teachers (like most teenagers do) and Ceara kindly but strongly reminded them that we were going to the temple, and that kind of talk needed to stop now. You know it means so much more coming from one of the older girls than from a leader. Rock on, girl!

At the insistence of my sil Kim, I created a facebook page. It's like one day, I vaguely know what facebook is, and the next--I realize there's a HUGE party that's been going on behind my back. j/k I used the "friend finder" and saw tons of people I knew from various stages in my life: middle school, high school, college, working, wards we've been in, former YW (the best!) . . . but you have to click "add as friend" to see their profile, and they have to accept. So I clicked away. But I think I made a big mistake. I tried to add a current Laurel in my ward, and she hasn't accepted. I can imagine her sitting around the lunch table like this:

Ohmygosh, I have to tell you guys the creepiest thing.

What?

My Young Womens president, is like, stalking me or something. She wants me to add her as a friend on my facebook page.

Ohmygosh, that is way freaky. What is she, like over 30? Cuz that's gross.

I know. I totally like her on Sunday and everything, but she needs to hang out with people her own age.

***

What else. Politics. I never write about politics on this blog because I don't like confrontation and discord, especially impassioned mean-spiritedness. But I do have an opinion. My opinion is . . . that I don't know what to think. My core ideology says one thing, but my psychological read on people (which is very good, by the way), tells me another. I'm not confused as in "I have no idea what I believe in" or "I don't have a clue about the issues," but more about what is truly best for the country at this point.

But Tyce is making a political statement of his own in the form of his Halloween costume: he's going as Barack Obama. All he has to do is wear a suit and he's set.

One more thing. Our dear friend Teresa is the post-adoption specialist at Casa, and she sent a newsletter to all the adoptive families. Reading her article was a much needed boost, a breath of fresh air. Most of the time I expect our children to be "normal" and I think they usually blend in to the normal population. But there are times when it seems like chaos reigns and I wonder what I'm doing wrong--when tempers erupt, fights break out, schoolwork suffers, lies are told, threats are made--and I wonder, what have I gotten myself into? How am I going to get them through all of this?

And while I know that other people have children who deal with some of these problems, it can be lonely not having our Casa community to talk with about the added issues of being an adoptive parent. It would be like being in an area where you were the only one with your religious beliefs--there are certainly great people all around but sometimes you need to talk with someone who really "gets" you, all the way down to your core. So I am just incredibly thankful for our Casa family and their support in helping me regain perspective on raising our beautiful children.

That's about all for now. Bryce, Tyce, and Harrison are in Utah this weekend, so it's just Miss M. and Cam here with me for Conference weekend. I think we might set up a tent in the living room.