Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The perils of taking a closer look

Come with me. I have to show you something.

Imagine you're walking down the hall, when something catches your eye. A spot of some sort. You wonder if it's a smudge or . . . well, you need a closer look.

You still can't quite figure it out, but it looks like it might be . . .

OH, FOR THE LOVE OF INSECTICIDES! Seriously? Someone stapled an earwig to the wall!

You reel in shock, cover your eyes, and shout commands to your brain: Rewind! Reverse! Erase from memory!

Then you think, if only it were that easy you'd live in a state of constant bliss.

Instead you cry, "NO STAPLING BUGS TO THE WALL!"

Which, of course, doesn't really need to be said.

You think about asking why. You really do. But then you realize it would be an exercise in futility. There is no real answer. You know this.

If there's anything you know in this world, you know this.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Where am I?

I had to sign into my own blog today, it'd been that long. Password and everything.


Neglect. Guilt. Trepidation.

If you have been silently resenting me for not writing anything of substance this month, it worked.

I'm back, but just remember:

baby steps.

I have other responsibilities too, you know. Like catching up on So You Think You Can Dance.

If you're too busy for TV, you're too busy for life, I always say.

(Just kidding. I just made that up.)

Sorry for the one-sided conversation. I can see you on the other end mouthing, "Honey, it's HER again! You know I'm going to be a good 30 minutes . . . maybe an hour. Just start the movie without me."

So before we go on, how are you? Really? Are you having a good summer? That's awesome!

Annnnnnddddd . . . back to me.

Let me tell you what's been going on with us this summer. Briefly, of course.

You know how I roll.

1. Tyce went to a week-long football camp at UNLV. Tyce suffered the wrath of the head coach (Mike Sanford) for wearing a BYU jersey one day to practice.

2. Bryce's sisters have all visited: first Heather, then Betsie and crew, and then Kim and 13-year-old Ben. I love an excuse to tour my own city. We saw The Lion King with Heather and Tyce, Bryce and I saw Phantom while Heather watched the kids, and Bryce, Kim, Ben, and Tyce saw the Cirque show KA. We went to the Bellagio to see the conservatory and fountains. If it weren't so crazy hot we'd have gone to Red Rock. But you know how it is . . . dry heat loses its upper hand when the temperature creeps up to 115.

3. Our niece Kess turned 7 and we had a little party. She even had Las Vegas friends to invite, a family from "home" living out here. A highlight was the water balloon fight in the back yard. Oh, the thrill of getting someone wet who had no intention of participating! Betsie went the the NKTOB concert and was close enough to rip the clothes off of Joey(?) but showed amazing restraint by just snapping photos instead.

4. We had a mini-vacation / anniversary trip. Our anniversary isn't for another month, but we pretty much celebrate whenever we get the chance. Heather, wonderful Heather, watched the kids for two days while Bryce and I stayed at The Venetian (and saw Phantom of the Opera). Guess what. Our room had 3 TVs. One was mounted above the mirror in the bathroom. At first I thought that was over the top, but after watching Saved by the Bell while brushing my teeth, my view has changed from luxury to NECESSITY.

May I interject that my husband is awesome. I love him so much. Seriously, I'd rather be with him than anyone else in the world. And get this, he even earned us $40 from video poker with the $50 free credit The Venetian gave us. So not only is he my best friend, he makes me laugh, he supports and loves me . . . he also assuages my guilt at ordering an $8 cheesecake at the Grand Luxe Cafe by rocking the slot machines.

Not gambling. Soooooo not gambling.

Also . . . Phantom! Go see it! The chandelier is wild!

5. Tyce had a birthday, shout hooray! He had cinnamon rolls for breakfast, Red Lobster for lunch, and then a family party with an ice cream cake for dessert. Sugar and seafood . . . who can know the mind of a teenager?

I just want to give a little shout out to Mr. T for being a great kid with a kind heart. I am lucky to be his mom. Go Tyce!

6. Girls Camp was mid-July and it was great, of course. There was dirt . . . and dust . . . and more dirt. I never knew I could be so filthy just walking around a camp. Going to the reservoir and doing the zip line were highlights for me.

The older girls loved their overnight hike and repelling. I think all would agree that testimony meeting was the best part of camp. I love the young women, the ward leaders (Aranne, Cindy, and Kara) were wonderful, and the stake leaders did a great job.

Luckily I have Tyce, who prepared me for participating in discussions with the girls regarding the inexplicably popular Charlie the Unicorn.

(Watch at your own risk. You have been warned.)

When I came home from camp I was greeted by Harrison, who took one look at me and asked, "Why is your hair stringy? Did you not pack a brush at camp?"


7. Bryce had a birthday too, on the 22nd. We celebrated the next day with Kim and Ben and a chocolate cake. That's when they saw KA, and by all reports it was still brilliant. He still has that joint Father's Day / birthday present to look forward to, the mysterious kayak trip, time and place TBD.

8. It was great having Kim and Ben here.

Cousins Ben and Tyce spent 2 weeks together. Video games, Dr. Demento, Boggle, and fending off the twins . . . I'd say that sums it up. Ben is taller than I am now, with a deep voice that freaked me out when I forgot he was in the house. I know Tyce enjoyed having someone his age to relate to. Sometimes the two of them would roughhouse and it looked just like watching an episode of "Wild Kingdom." You could almost hear the narrator say:

"Young males play-fight as a way to hone their hunting skills, release aggression, and establish dominance."

I have to say I was so proud of the two of them when it came to picking a movie to see. They both really wanted to see a popular movie out right now, that everybody is seeing and all the kids are talking about. Both Bryce and I had heard about bad language and bad scenes in the movie, so Bryce did a little online research to figure out just what was in it. He presented the information to the boys, saying, "You're both 13. You're old enough to make your own decisions. But I just thought you should know what you'd be getting into."

They both decided not to see it, and watched something else instead.

Go cousins!

9. Man, is this like the longest post ever? Like a rainstorm after a drought . . . watch out . . . FLOOD!

I could probably go on but for the sake of time, I will stop.

What's that? You want more?


baby steps.

But tune in again soon.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Time is getting away from me

Sorry for another short post, basically apologizing for not posting.

Heather left, the Prices came to visit, the Prices left, and now cousin Ben is visiting.

Oh, and I'm going to girls camp tomorrow.

I will leave you with something funny.

Bryce put the twins to bed a few nights ago. Harrison was interested in me going to girls camp. He asked, "Who will be her master? You know, the master? At camp? You need a master?"

And finally he realized Harrison was asking who was in charge, since he knows that Tyce's camps are always headed up by Brother Stembridge, the Scout master.

It all makes perfect sense, doesn't it?

Oh, we sure do have cute kids.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

A very short post

1. Heather's visiting!

2. Tyce turned 13!

3. We saw the Lion King on stage at Mandalay Bay!

4. We lit fireworks for the 4th of July!

I have been sick and busy. So sorry about my abrupt hiatus. I will fill you in shortly. Right after I get back from, oh, my mini-vacation with Bryce. That's right. Booyah.