Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Advice for Young People re: Vampires

Dear Young Friend,

I am pretty sure you're not a vampire. But it wouldn't surprise me if you had a crush on one. Apparently they are pretty hard to resist. I know I'd appreciate a man who sparkled.

(Bryce, take note!)

But this is a serious matter, young people. Books and movies make these relationships seem beautiful and romantic and without consequence. I'm here to tell you, there are consequences.

Not every part-vampire looks as cute and sweet as baby Renesmee.



Some . . . well, let's just say that some children won't compete in any beauty pageants.

Beware, young people, of vampire love.

You could have a baby like this:





A Hillbilly Vampire.

They're cute except when they chase you, fangs bared, with a rally cry of "Git 'er done!"

Don't say I haven't warned you. Beware. Be vigilant.

And when they're running full force, be afraid.

Sincerely,
Your older, wiser friend

5 comments:

Denalee said...

LOVE IT!

FoReVeR WeLcH said...

Hahahahahahah sooo FUNNY!!!!!
Is that going to be the Renesmee in the movie?????????

Rebecca and Co. said...

Hmmm, I don't know. When I did a google images search for renesmee this picture came up several times on the first page. She's a doll though, isn't she?

Emmy said...

That little girl is cute, I wonder if she will really be here. And that picture of your son is hilarious!

Mopsie said...

When I read your blog I just scroll slowly, one paragraph or picture at a time, so Harrison was a total laugh-out-loud surprise. You're too funny, Rebie.