So this rebirth, so to speak, has been a long time coming. I actually started implementing some of my changes before the new year rolled in, so you know I'm serious. But my motivation and inspiration have been working in me for about a year; I finally decided that I am worth my own time.
I am putting ME first.
Man, just writing that is a relief but also a stress. A relief in the sense that I'm giving myself permission to pursue enjoyment and fulfillment; and stress because, to my ears, it sounds so foreign and self-centered. But one thing I know is that I'm not able to give what I don't have, and so I am actively focusing on filling myself up--not as a desperate act to get more to-do boxes checked off, but to take time to feel, really FEEL happy.
I have had some very, very good days so far. I am going to make a dream board; what do you think of that!!??
Here are some things that are important to me:
Clean eating--whole foods, no chemicals. I feel pretty darn awesome so far.
Exercising--to keep my heart healthy and my mind clear. This is one of the best times for me to think. Also, the dog loves it so I feel like I'm doing right by her. I even RAN a little the last few days. Hello.
Meditating--oh man, I forgot how much I like doing that. One of my favorite ways to meditate is through guided imagery. Tyce walked in on me in the lotus position the other day while the soothing voice on the YouTube video encouraged me to "see yourself as a powerful, sensual, attractive woman." I asked Tyce if he'd ever meditated and he said, "Not like that!" Ha. Get used to it, kids.
Making my marriage a priority--this has been hard lately, for a long time. When circumstances make it impossible, literally, to be alone--it is a huge strain in the relationship. Much of my focus is on attitude but I have also decided that I will meet Bryce every other week for lunch so at least we can have a date that way. I haven't even told him that yet so maybe he won't be excited? Oh well, it's on my dream board so it's gonna happen, people.
Taking a class--I give myself permission to take a class of some kind. Maybe yoga, maybe art history. I don't know.
Trip to NYC with Carmen--we talked about this years ago and we are celebrating our upcoming 40th birthdays with a vacation by ourselves!!!!
And this my mantra for the year:
This is me. This is me rockin' my own world, being the star of my own life, doing what I was born to do--really LIVE.
This is my year.